As he prepares for his speech Tuesday night declaring the end of major combat operations in Iraq, here are some hints for Barack Obama.
- Don’t wear the full flight suit. Don’t deliver your speech on an aircraft carrier.
- Avoid any big banners in the background that may later be used against you. (i.e., “Mission Accomplished”).
- Walk. Don’t make splashy arrival by jet.
- Don’t give pundits ammunition by noting that you’re pre-empting “Plain Jane” and “Wipeout.”
- Stay away from anything that may be considered Muslim sentiments. Nutcases are already running with what they don’t know.
- Drop any cutesy quotes from Melia, such as “Daddy, when are you going to fix that war?”
- Don’t load up the speech with mentions of Earl, Katrina or names of other hurricanes you may know.
- Naturally, don’t dredge up the economy, mosques or any other hot topic.
- Avoid topical small talk or jokes about Emmy winners, Glenn Beck rally or “Dancing with the Stars” contestants.’
- Then again, maybe announce the “Dancing with the Stars” contestants midway through the speech.